My Low Standards For Awesome-ness... Still Pretty Awesome, Though

Post #34: (This post has not been made or worded in any way that intended to offend. I was just poking fun! [you'll understand what i mean in the second part])

So, i decided to check my email and after going through 17-out-of-19 messages about Pinterest that i don't really care about (I don't care that whoever-whoever liked my pin, it's not like i found the pin myself and then pinned it up, i was just exploring the Geek/Humor section and stumbled upon it! It's technically not even mine!)

And then there was a message about YouTube and someone replied to one of my comments (my 19th was a reply too, but i'll get to that later, i don't want to put in my angry eyes right this second) So, yeah, sometimes i comment on videos if it made me laugh or there was a part i liked, you know, that usual crud. (it's the reason why made a YouTube channel, to comment and subscribe to people!)
Anyways, i didn't even remember the comment or the video in question, but i opened the email and it was a random person who commented a random time on the video (i don't even know what he wanted me to see because going to 8:15 had nothing to do with either my comment or the video itself, because nothing monumental was happening at that moment that was worth notice...*shrug*)
Because i didn't even remember the video i click on the link and i looked at it and i was like: "Oh, yeah, i remember this." and i scrolled down a little...  And I Was Second Top Comment.
I
Was
Second
Top
Comment

Second
Top
Comment

TOP
COMMENT

TOP!

(By now you are understanding the title of this post.)

Sorry, i can't tell you which video it was because my real name kind of, sort of, shows through in my username. But! It was a PewDiePie video!
(i knew good was to come by watching those!)

It wasn't even that good of a comment, a little funny maybe, but it was a time in the video and a funny comment on what was happening. It was ten words, maximum. (look at me being all modest  L= )



Parte de dos:
So that was my awesome moment of the day. I obviously don't get those daily, though, because if i did this blog would be exploding with epic stories.

Now, for my angry moment of the day
No, it was not in History class when our substitute teacher wouldn't stop telling his personal stories about immigration. Or when i was sitting there during his stories and studying for the 2 minute quick test he was supposed to be giving. Or when he gave us ten minutes to study after the stories, then preceded to tell another story, and then said, "Alright, you have ten minutes to study." OR when we got the test and i finished it in 10 seconds and everyone was like "Oh wow, she must have cheated, how did she do that so fast?"
It was a test with 10 questions, multiple choice. *eyes roll*

My real angry moment, in which i'm explaining to Anonymous right now as we speak and taking my real nice and easy time to do so, well it was the 19th message, also from YouTube.

PewDie is playing a game called Scribblenauts (it's hilarious the way he plays it, it probably wouldn't be as fun in real life, though)
The point of the game is that you have a magical notebook that spawns whatever you write in it and you're supposed to use it to help people and the magic of helping people will save your sister, who is turning to stone because you played a mean prank on some guy, and blah, blah, blah.
Now, this game has a knack for references.
PewDie has spawned Nyan Cat, Keyboard Cat, Hipsters (tried spawning Slenderman)... and, YES, he has even spawned a Rideable  Flying, Giant, Stephano. And Mr. Chair too.
So, i had an Ah-Ha moment and commented something like this:
"PewDie! Try to spawn yourself! If they *(As in the creators)* know about Stephano, then they probably know about you too!"

(i hope that doesn't land in top comments [although i'm not that confident in my comment-making skills] or everyone will sort of kind of know my name)

How cool would it be for PewDie to be on a Giant, Rideable, Flying, PewDiePie?
Really cool.

So, you all understand what i meant by my comment right? Well some guy replied to me with something like this:
*facepalm*
PewDie came up with Stephano, not the creators

WHAT?

Did my comment even sound like in anyway that i meant that the game created Stephano. No!
Don't you DARE facepalm to me when i'm well aware of what i'm talking about!
At that moment my inner ghetto black woman came out and i snapped my finger and rotated my head and was thinking: "Oh Heh, no!" (Heh, as in heck of course)

My reply was really nice though and was something like:
"Oh, i know that, sorry for making it sound like how you thought i meant by it. =)"

But in my head i was like:
"Don't you dare ever facepalm in my direction again, or i will let my inner ghetto black woman out all over you and you will regret it, child!" (meant to be said like a ghetto black woman)

It just made me mad.
I hope it wasn't someone who was trolling me because, if that's so, the troll won.
(well, YouTube doesn't know that because of my nice and considerate revision on my comment, but i guess that everyone knows my true feelings, now)

Alright this was supposed be a 5 second post but i just got so into it and that stupid child who thought he could facepalm in my direction, seriously, the comment was as plain and clear, seriously, if i ever...

This is UnicornSlayer saying: "Ah man, Shanaynay is coming back out, someone help me... like how that stupid little white boy is going to need help after i find him! I'll bring my brother out too so he can hold my earrings while i whoop his scrawny little..."

                                                 Unicorn Slayer

My Friday (so far)

Post #33:

If you're wondering why i've been so active with my blogging... well... i honestly don't know, guys. I just have.
I guess i'm just trying to give you guys something to look forward to. Just something part of some-what daily routine. Like: Watch PewDiePie videos, Watch Cry videos, check iFunny, check email, check UnicornSlayer's blog.
( =) I'm sure the first part is just part of my daily schedule.)

So my Friday so far, i guess pretty good.
A little chilly though, but i guess pretty good... Well i had to wear my third best pair of pants today because My 1st are going through the laundry and my 2nd has freaking gum on the knee from when i crossed my legs or something and it bumped some gum under my desk in chemistry. Made me so mad.
Anyways, my 3rd best are boot cut and not the comfortable and sometimes they're flood jeans.
So that added some suck to the day, but i guess it was still okay.
The worst of the day was probably History because we had to watch a movie that didn't have to do anything with history at all, pretty much. This History class is a blow off class so no one payed attention to movie. I worked on my PewDiePie collage of pictures and worked on touching up my drawing of a Bro (monster from Amnesia)
And of course, because History sucks so bad and things just had to suck more, my seat is by the Perv King (i think i mentioned this before, so sorry if you already knew that) He was out in all of his Perverted glory. I don't want to repeat what he said because it's against my morals to even say Heck. (I know that seems a little weird because i've said things like slut before... but it's a little different to write that than say that. I don't like saying that aloud and i try my best to keep my words as clean as possible, but when you're in High School, well, it has a way of spoiling the youngest of fruits. [weird analogy there]) It was horrible. Anonymous was laughing and it was disgusting. I didn't want to move because we were supposed to be watching the movie (even thought the teacher knew we weren't watching it and was actually talking to us too)  but i didn't want to move and turn attention towards myself and sit in the back and just draw and make him think i wasn't paying attention, even though he wouldn't have cared.
But, i have an aversion to getting in trouble (a good fear to have, i suppose) and i didn't want to move.
So, i sat there.
And listened to the sexual questions asked by the Perv King to the girl in front of me (she probably like it though, considering how she never told him to leave her alone, or moved from her seat, or told the teacher)
I am the master of the Poker Face when it comes to things like this. I mean, it i played the game where you can't laugh or you lose, well i would suck at, and at actual Poker, too (even though i have no idea how to play that...  honestly, no idea)

That reaaaally sucked. But then during the next period, study hall, i made a Cry-lage (like a PDP collage, but with Cry's avatar with different emotions)
So my day wasn't really ruined.

The only sucky part of my day was when i was getting on the bus to go home and i tripped going up the stairs. It was awkward. I shook it off, but it was still awkward.
Right now i'm watching a three-episode-of-Doctor-Who marathon.
I don't know why but i always expect a weeping angel attack. The first episode I've ever watched was an extremely sad episode about weeping angels in which they go to the future and they find an older Rory who dies and all this other stuff and the weeping angels are evil and they built the hotel place and then there's a book that tells of the future but you can't read it or it will finalize the future and present day Rory kills himself so a paradox will be created and everything works out and they go to the present and fixed the future but then Rory is taken off guard and attack by an angel and Amy sacrifices herself to be with Rory and it's all really sad... but something that i don't understand is that there are new episodes on, right, so i guess they didn't die... It's confusing a little, but at least i can enjoy all the witty and quirky things the Doctor does in older episodes and random marathons. I guess that's the beauty of starting a show that has been on for so long and is so beloved... you have so much to watch and you're pretty sure it's going to be good.

Anyways, i don't know how i went on talking about a show that i've only watched about five and half episodes of, but... as i was saying...

My Friday has been generally boring.
I wish i could spin you a tale of passion, adventure, wit, and fun, all tied up with my heroics and the defeat of evil, but, i'm sorry, my life isn't that exciting. I wish i could tell you that i've run away with the Doctor and stared at angels at the same time I've met my 30 year old daughter (or something along the lines of an actual plot of one episode) but my life isn't that interesting and fun.
I wish i could tell you something that would make you extremely excited to see that i've posted something new... but i just can't.

Sorry (oh geez, i just realized that my inner voice is sounding British)

So, the most exciting thing i've thought about today is that i can stay up until 4 AM watching videos and sleep until 4 PM afterwards. Oh, the weekend, the joys you bring me. (unless my family wants me to be social for some reason)

So that kind of explains what i'll be doing for the next two days. So if i don't post, then i guarantee that you didn't miss anything.

(i just realized that i start a lot of my paragraphs with "So")

Okay, i just watched a really weird episode of Doctor Who. Apparently the doctor is going to die... but it was made in 2011, I'm sure i would have noticed on Pinterest if there was a 12th Doctor.

So

I guess i'm going to watch it and see if i can understand what happens...

This is UnicornSlayer leaving you with the message of: "Tick, Tock, goes the clock..."

                                                    Unicorn Slayer

My Week

Post #32:

So this week has strictly been on a: screw this crap!,  basis.

Ever since TG break, in which Wednesday was our first full day off, I've just sort've been laying in bed and enjoying the wifi. (even though it's a little sketchy and crashes sometimes)
On TG my family and i ate dinner at one PM and we were all in our jammies. Dinner lasted for about fifteen minutes, maybe. (but i'm not complaining)

Then, on the most Racist of All Days, (black Friday) well, it was horrible. I hate people. I'm an introvert with a dash of misanthrope.
Introverted Misanthrope?
That is one of the most accurate descriptions of me that anyone will ever think of.
So this day, or night, or morning, was horrific for me.
Brushing shoulders with people i dont know.
Oh god, i'm gagging just thinking about it. So uncomfortable... awkward... constricting.
Plus it was midnight and i was relaxing and watching YouTube videos, ready to spend the hours in my night owl bliss, when my sister comes screaming at me and i didn't have it in me to fight her.
So that's how i ended up picking up a random pair of cold jeans off of my floor, picking a shirt up out of my clean pile of clothes (or maybe it was dirty) and going to the unrelenting Mall just so we could buy a handful of towels, some hot chocolate K-cups, and a little tiny handheld vacuum.
Yeah.
It sucked.
My sister took me to Rue 21 and they have the little perfume testers by the register so my mother decided to shove a couple in my face and then my hand smelled like perfume because i must've gotten some on me so when i went home i petted my cat and then she smelled like it. Not even like a fragrance, just that gross perfumey smell that every perfume has under the good smell.
Yeah
i was choking on perfume all night after i got home...
Not fun.

So, that was the freaking worst, but i guess it gets better.

For the past two days straight i've been watching YouTube videos made by a guy who calls himself PewDiePie, maybe you've heard of him, maybe not. My last Video Of The Week was of him playing Slender (which was the first video i watched of him, myself)
Well he's put up over 1,000 videos over the course of 2 years, so i'm on this mad dash to watch most of them. A little impossible? Sure. Yeah. Probably. But that's okay. I'll still try.
My next VOTW will probably be of him.
I just need to find one that isn't Slender related that is at least a little bit appropiate and one that i think other people might like.
I mean, i got my sister to watch him play Slender! She kept making me find different videos for her to watch, eventually i ran out of slender videos and i found funny/scary montages for her to watch but My Pod was being temperamental, and it was also the wifi's fault too, so everything kept freezing and crashing and... sadness.
Anyways.
2 straight days of YouTube.
Yes!
I'm going places with my life.

Hey! It's six! If i was playing Sims 2 then i would have just aged a day. True Story.

Alright, well my week story is pretty much over now.
Other than saying that i didn't even start to read the... six or so chapters for English in Wuthering Heights and the... maybe, ten worksheets that goes with it.
*sigh*

So even though the title of this post is about my week i'm going to go on for maybe a couple or more paragraphs that has nothing to do with this week.

As shameful as it is... and please don't un-follow me as soon as i say this, but my sister dragged me to see the last of the twilight series. I know. I feel like i committed one of the seven deadly sins. I'm sorry if your self respect for me went a little bit... but i did.
You might hate me the most when i say that i've actually seen the whole series.
Well, you know what they say, keep your friends close but your enemies closer.
I was just being tactful when i saw them, you should be proud of me.

But, something good came out of this sinful event.

Lewis told me about this movie coming out, Warm Bodies, a day or so before i even saw the trailer in the theatre (she talks about it a little more in, i think, her most recent post) but before i saw the trailer in the theatre my sister was like, "So there's this movie coming out that i think you'll like, but maybe not, but it's called Warm Bodies..." Then i was like, "Warm Bodies?! i want to see that so bad, [Lewis] told me about it a couple of days ago... blah blah blah" Then we went on about how cute the guy is and how cute the story. I was really surprised that she wanted to see it because she frowns upon horror-type movies and this was about zombies, but apparently she thought the story was cute and she wants to see it... sooo...

February 1st, i'll be waiting for you!

First, January 14th, then February 1st? My beginning-of-the-year is going to pretty sweet. Those Mayans better be lying about December, though, or i'll be really upset!
.... Maybe all our ghosts can get together and create a ghost society together like nothing happened (we would ignore the obvious signs of the apocalypse though, like the demolished cities and such) and we would all just live on with no sickness and death and hunger and we would all be happy and the ghost scientists will create laptops that ghosts can touch and they would create chairs that we wouldn't fall through we sat down and all this stuff that us intangible ghosts can touch and we would live and the world would be a better place.

Yeah...

Rainbows...

(i forgot to put this in... i'm editing this in... fifteen minutes after posting this, but i just forgot to say that i downloaded Slender and i tried to play it but my ancient laptop couldn't handle it and it was lagging and buffering and it took me five seconds to take one step forward... if you watch my last VOTW then you realize that it was probably a blessing that it didn't work, but i'm still pretty sad that i've never played it.)

=)
Anyways, that was pretty much all i wanted to talk about.
Oh, wait!
First, a little self promotion.
If you have an Instagram and want to follow me my name is UNICORNSLAYER388
Don't ask why it's all in caps though, that just how it appears even though i thought i put it in as UnicornSlayer388
My profile picture is of a cat sitting on a window sill (iz my kitty!)
I would tell you my Pinterest but i use my real name on that... so... sorry. (it's mostly pictures of bacon and zombies and Legend of Zelda things)
My Instagram is just pictures of my cats, Seraphina (my cat) and Peaches (my sister's cat) doing cute stuff, and of cool things i made with this SpaceFX app i found. I only have 17 pictures so far but i do have like, 40 followers for some reason... I don't know any of them. It's a little weird...
I used to do this whole thing where it's, You Follow Me, So I Follow You, but some of the people who follow me think that the point of Instagram is take pictures of yourself and post those, which is not the point at all so i stopped following them. Yeah. So if you do start to follow me, and if you do have an Instagram i would very much be happy if you commented your username at the end of this post so i know who you are.

Hmm
I feel like one of those annoying people who comment on a popular video on YouTube and are like "hey, i like this person, but i'm awesome too, so check me out at blahblahblah thanks for reading this because i'm awesome and cute and it would make my day for you to do this. blahbah."
I HATE those people.

Alright my dear followers thank you for putting up me and my Introverted Misanthrope-ism. I will post again if my life is any more interesting. (ha, it will never be interesting) See you later.

                                                      Unicorn Slayer

Let's Blame It On The Wi-Fi, Shall We?

Post #31:

Yes, i apologize, i have not graced you beautiful followers with my presence in the form of a post in... well... too long. I feel ashamed that i shoved you away to the darkest depths of my priorities. Nevermore shall i ignore you for such a long time. I am a hideous wretch who dost deserve great punishment. Continue your loyalty and i will show you that your decision to forgive me was not a mistake... anon.


Alright, well now that i have gotten the formal apologies out of the way, i'll get on with explaining myself. If the title hasn't given it away yet, it was my Wi-Fi. Yes, i said it, Wi-Fi. A Long while ago the heavens parted and sent down a magical device called a router and attached it to the side of my house. I can now have the power to search the internet wirelessly. Woo!
This happened a while ago and i tried to post from my iPod but everytime i would try it would either crash, or when i got to the "create a post" page my keyoard wouldn't pop up and i couldn't type. Sorry.
I really, truely tried but ten minutes ago i figured out how to make the wifi work on my laptop... i had to flick a switch to the one position... i sincerely never knew what the button did until this day, even though in the days before Wi-Fi i played with it sometimes during loading screens. Whoops. * embarrassed shrug* What'ca gonna do, right?

I really wished i could blog before though because ever since the devil slapped me and sent me flying backwards into the heck i've been trying to escape once again i've been feeling pretty crappy. It mostly has to do with the Perv King (we all remember him, right?) and my gym class with the most annoying/skanky girl/tramps in both my grade and, the one above me, eleventh. Every Monday and Friday during eighth period. Let's just say that my friends know to beware of me during ninth on those days.


Okay, priority moment here. I knew that every moment that i wanted to blog, well i wouldn't remember them, but i pledged myself into saying, that as soon as i post again, i will tell you... well i lost.
The contest i entered, i lost. The writing contest. Yeah... you're reading something a loser wrote.
As i read the email my heart was pounding and i read the winners and honorable mentions names... and i wasn't one of them. Though, the email did mention a contestant who sent their story in ten minutes before they were due and knowing that i was sort of mentioned made me feel a little special because that email was sent to everyone who entered the contest... that's a lot of people man!


Back to the most current parts of life... well nothing is happening right now. I'm home alone, my sister is with my mother to get her hair cut, my brother went to a friend's party my dad probably drove him.
I'm planning on trying to download Slender and maybe Minecraft, if they're free. I'll probably cry whilst playing Slender and Minecraft is just something to do to waste time.
If you don't know what Slender is, it's a scary and simple game to play on the computer that... will probably make me cry.
If you don't know what Minecraft is, its a game with intentionally bad graphics that's pointless.

You can go look it up if you care enough too. (My video of the week, located at the bottom of the blog, is Slender related!)

Let's end this post with talking about TV!
Season 3 of Face-Off is over and happy that Nicole won! I was hoping for Alana but Nicole was always the second person i cheered for, so i'm happy she won. I didn't actually watch the finale, i forgot about it and had to look it up the next day.
I found out that Being Human will be coming back on January 14th! *jumping for joy* Even though, by now i started to rationalize about the ending and i realize that Josh probably didn't get shot and Nora probably shot the one guy who turned Josh into a wolf... wait... that means he and Nora won't have their werewolf powers! Well maybe Nora shot the guy in the leg because she couldn't kill him, you know, and, because two shots were heard after the screen went black, after he fell he shot a bullet into the air. That's probably it. And for Aiden being literally "grounded" in the ground... in a coffin... supposedly forever, well i bet Henry is going to save him because he was only a little half deadish when Aiden saw him last and he would know what was happening and save him. For Sally, well i don't know because the episode ended with her crying for help using her ghost powers to talk through the radio... i don't know whats going on with her. Maybe she'll e saved somehow.  Janurary 14th!
And in other news i started to watch Doctor Who and The Walking Dead. My friend Lewis Spongi watches Doctor Who so she helped catch me up to speed on most of the things i had questions about. So that was good.
I dont' know what to talk about anymore so let's call this a post!

Again i am sorry my dear followers that you have been ignored. I give many thanks to the fact that you still read my post and i hope you have forgiven me and my regretful behavior. UnicornSlayer here, signing off, peace my brethren and... sistern.

                                                    Unicorn Slayer

A Title You Ask? Well, That'll Give Away The Ending!

Post #30:

I'm watching Ghost Hunters... i don't know why though...

I've noticed my lack of watching Dead Like Me... missed a bunch of episodes...

The new season of Face-off isn't as great as it seemed to be... rather watch a new season of Being Human (last time i watched it was in March... i'm feeling very deprived) #firstworldproblems (haha, i don't have a twitter)

I'm a little obsessed with Tap Tap Revenge 4 on my Pod of the touch... i found out there's a button to hit which gives you a bunch of free songs ("Download unlocked tracks") and now i have fifty new songs and i can't remember which songs i like or don't. i have a lot of dance/electronic songs that sound like space, go on for five minutes, and don't have anyone singing in them. Good if you're in a club or something like that, but not if you're bored, sitting in your room.
i also have a lot of heavy metal songs (i call them "rawr songs") in which it's all incomprehensible yelling. I have like ten of those songs. Sure, Linkin Park style yelling is fine in moderation, but seriously dude, the whole song of screams? And the band names are like: "Cannibal Corpse" Whitechapel" "As I Lay
Dying" "Behemoth" "Goatwhore" "Primordial" and "Gwar" okay that was seven, but still i was scrolling through my new songs and just by the artist name, song title, album picture, and genre title ("rock" they call it) i can tell the song's not going to be fun and it seems like i found a rawr song every other song.
There are two songs i got that i really like, one of them is called "The Dressing Room" which is by Breathe Carolina. If you remember they had that one song called "Blackout" that was kind of popular during the summer last year. Anyways, the song isn't supposed to be taken in a perverted kind of way, its more like... the dressing room is the place where you change who you are. At least that's what i got.
Another song is by some band i never heard of, who i'm going to look into, called Sparks To The Rescue. The one song i like is called "We Love Like Vampires." This band reminded me of a 1/2 cup of Fall Out Boy, a 1/4 cup of My Chemical Romance and a pinch of Owl City, to taste, it also has a bit of it's own original flavor. The song, well they never really say the reason why they love like vampires. The singer guy mentions the "sun coming out" many times, and also about them "dancing in the underground" but not the real reason why. i guess it's up to interpretation. *shrug*
Look those up if you want.
I"m too lazy to put in a link.

Speaking of My Chemical Romance, i don't know why but i have a song by them by the name of "Helena" stuck in my head. I have the music video on my Pod, but i had nothing to do with the addition of it because my iPod us sync-ed to my sister's, so whatever she has, i have. Recently, i sync-ed new songs and i got the video. Now i think it's pretty and the girl in coffin, who i guess is supposed to be Helena, wears a pretty dress, but it was pretty different because it was really depressing and dark and the main singer guy kind of freaked me out because there was a lot of close ups and the dude was making some creepy faces at some times... other than that i thought the guy was pretty cute.
It was kind of weird to hear the song and then another song by them, "Teenagers" came on... it did not sound like the same band. Now i know MCR isn't a gothic band, on Tap Tap, i got a song called "Sing" which is also by them, which i like ( i don't have the whole song though because it was one of the three songs i got when i first downloaded the game... preloaded, i guess i should call it) and you know, it's not gothic or emo or whatever you want to call it... the music video looked like a SiFi movie. (They all die in the video... sorry for that spoiler) It was just weird because in "Teenagers" they're swearing up a storm and when i was like ten and first heard this song i shunned it because of the language. Then when i was de-sensitized to swearing (thanks, highschool) i let the song back into the club.
Now, remember that i mentioned this song.

So, i got this game called Lollipop Chainsaw for PS3. It's about an 18 year old blond cheerleader with huge breasts and a short skirt, who runs around in cheerleading outfit wielding a chainsaw covered in glitter and hearts. There's a zombie apocalypse going on and she with her cheerleader moves and (sorry to spoil it, but...) her skills as a pro zombie hunter, you cut zombies up, trying to stop the goth freak who opened the path to "The Rotten World" which released a gas that turned people into zombies, then those zombies bit people and more zombies came and blah blah... It was a pretty fun game. The story was short, with a quick learning prologue and six stages followed by a boss battle. It was fun because you're freaking cutting zombies while doing flips and all these things i wish i could do, every time you cut a zombie they bleed pink and hearts and rainbows come out of nowhere and... well it was pretty cool. The things i didn't like were the boss battles (at the end of the stages), the final boss battle, the excessive bad language (i know that they're in highschool, but still it was really bad, not even like the f-word and the s-word, but like slang words,  like d-bag, slut, whore, the b-word was used a lot, slang words of the sexual persuasion [which where really bad because me and eleven year old brother were playing this game and he asked me what "masser-date" was... i told him he heard it wrong and that the guy who i saved, who said this to my character, said that he said he was going to ask me on a date...] now my brother plays war games and Grand Theft Auto, so it's not like it was really horrible, it's not like he was like how i was four years ago.)
I didn't like the boss battles because they were a joke. The big boss battle was against a guy named "Killabilly" who looked like Elvis. All the boss battles were centered around a music genre, but seriously, the main boss battle was really stupid that it made me mad. "The king" pssh. great.
Now, what i'm trying to work my way up to is talking about the first boss battle, my favorite. The first boss battle was centered around the punk rock genre. The guy was named Zed. reminds me of Led Zeppelin. (the name, i don't know about the music) but still, i don't know if it's my favorite because it's the easiest, but i think it's mostly because of the fight. Now, imagine you're fighting some guy and they're seriously are trying to mess you up. Don't you think you're going to spewing some unfavorable words?  Well freaking Zed would call me something reaaally bad like an effing b----, and then those words would pop up out of nowhere in these big electric letters that you have to run from. Things he called me ranged from an effing b-----, a c---sucker, a "stupid cooze" (which is probably worse than the eff word in Britain and it's a law that anyone who says it gets their mouth washed out with soap by the queen herself) and my personal favorite, a vanilla slut.
Way to be creative, Zed, i haven't heard that one yet. He was probably programmed to say more, but he didn't get that all out. the first time i fought him he called me a f---b-- five million times.
Anyways, that wasn't really important to talk about, i just couldn't stop typing. What i really wanted to say (which is going to take two sentences, really.) Is... well when you make your way up to Zed's stage, you go through a junkyard and have to jump around crashing cars and all that, and so, as they ran up to Zed, Juliet (the cheerleader) and her boyfriend (Nick, who is a severed head hooked to her belt loop) where talking, as usual, and... they called Zed a My Chemical Romance wannabe (Juliet said that.) That made me laugh. Then Nick said something like, oh i like that band, even hear their song, Teenagers?  I was laughing so hard on the inside. That is really popular song... they mention it in Vlad Tod, too. Freaking awesome.

Told you all that other stuff was probably pointless, but i gave you a little of incite. So, recap, stupid bosses, a lot of bad language, really fun, rainbows, glitter, hearts, pink blood, and references i understand. I give it a seven. oh yeah, and the graphics aren't totally up to date, so if you're a graphics snob then you may be sad, but it's not horrible.

(i'm not watching ghost hunters anymore)

Hmm, well that's all i've got for now.
total recap?

Ghost hunters
dead like me
face off
being human
tap tap 4
rawr songs
"The Dressing Room": by Breathe Carolina
"We Love Like Vampires" by Sparks To The Rescue (i just watched the music video five seconds ago and it was really weird and awkward, don't watch the video.)
My Chemical Romance:
"Helena"
"Sing"
"Teenagers"
Creative language by Zed
Lollipop Chainsaw gets a seven
(i decided to put in the links!)

So, children, listen to music, play lollipop chainsaw when no one is in the house, watch tv, live long, and prosper


Unicorn Slayer

The Theme Today, Kids? Writing!

Post #29:

Things i've realized:

• When i get angry, my writings' voice starts to sound a little incomprehensible.
• i don't care about capitalizing my i's when i blog. Who cares, right? i know i don't.
• Even though i tell myself i'll start my summer project earlier the next year, i never do.
• My cats are wild. (but that has nothing to do with writing.)
• My motto about deadlines seems to be: If you didn't procrastinate, you didn't want it to be great.
• The word realize is one of those weird common words that actually uses an, unnecessary, "Z" in them.
• Fall out Boy doesn't rhyme when you think they will. Tricky, FOB, tricky. (not writing related either, and a topic for another post someday.)
• There seems to not be a lot of variety when it comes to writing a dragon story. Will it try to kill you, will you try to kill it, will it be good and let you ride it, will it be red, orange, breath fire, breath ice? That's about it. Not a lot of room for something new...
• Writing is like fine dining.
• When i listen to an accent for long enough (British television, Nadia G's bitchin' kitchen, Grand Theft Auto 4) my thoughts are in that accent. It's really annoying and i can't stop it until i watch american tv or... until i fall asleep and forget the accent.
• When in doubt, you just have to remember these two words: helicopter and bazooka.

I've lastly realized,

• Whoever named the grapefruit had seriously run out of names. What, did they pick a fruit's name out of a hat and say, there! we'll add the word fruit after this and then, bam, we have something totally new and different!    ??

      So, on the off chance you're wondering how my summer project turned out... well it all started at 8 am on the Monday before. 

          My head was foggy as i lifted it from the pillow, i heard a knock at the door and someone telling me to get up. I didn't want to, so i didn't, eventually it all turned to screaming and threats. I had to go with my sister to take our kittens to the vet for booster shots because apparently my sister couldn't handle two kittens. I knew deep inside that i was a ploy to get me out of bed. I laid still and my mom came in and threatened to take away my laptop, which i knew i needed to do my project, so, still half asleep, i tried to push my laptop under my bed to hide it from her. Maybe if she couldn't see it, she'd take away something stupid, like my phone. Well, dangling off the bed, trying to shove this laptop under my said bed, my mom walked in and i went limp, as if i was being dramatic about getting up. Eventually i couldn't take it though so i went with my sister, who didn't need my help in any way. If i wasn't there, i'm sure nothing would've happened different.

          I came home and went back to sleep, as if my body was making up for the rest lost i slept until 5 o clock. I was starting to get used to waking up at 10:30-11 ish so getting up this late was a kind of shock. I was afraid to have fallen into an old groove, but then again, i didn't care. I went through the beginning of the day, pretty normal. Acting like i've been reading since 2 or something, eating dinner as breakfast, chilling out, doing my thing, feeling guilty. Then when everyone started going to sleep, that's when i did my work. I don't remember the precise details, though, but let's just say with some aid from Anonymous and Lewis, up until... six-ish maybe, i was making progress. Then it was 7 and 8 and i was rushing to finish before my parents got up for work but then my mom woke up and went with my brother to take our dog to the vet for a booster or something... i don't remember, and i was rushing to sneak downstairs and print out my project, hoping that the loud annoying printer noises weren't going to wake up my dad, who was snoozing on the couch. The floor was cold and the the bright morning light was new to me, considering my nocturnal tendencies, the goosebumps on my arms and legs reminded me of an ending summer. Meaning... summer projects were due.   If one word could describe my printer, it would be crazy. It tells you that the ink pack things needs replacing but you replace it and it says the same thing again. (we got a new one) So after having it print one page and having it tell me to replace the ink thing, i said: screw this, and i went back to my room. I waited until my mom and brother came home and then pretended like they woke me up because they were loud when they were leaving. Then i ate some cereal and told my mom my project was due on that day and she helped me print it and then me and my sister turned it in and then it was around 12-ish maybe 11 and then me and my sister took a nap in my mother's room with our kittens. i'm not sure why my sister was so tired, but i had a good reason.

         

          Phew! Okay, that's my story.

          

          Speaking of stories, remember that contest i talked about, well two hours ago i emailed my entry in. Now, on the paper it said that the stories were due on midnight on August 14th. But does that mean, the end of the day or... there's august 13th 11:59pm and then there's august 14th 12:00am. Was i a day late? I don't know, but i turned in my story and hopefully i'm not. Hopefully i win the rights to have my story read to others during the Halloween and a to have it published on the site... and $50, but  i couldn't care less about $50.

         So, i'm going to put my story in the end of this post here, tell me if you think it deserves publicity, $50, and the tears of the people i've beat! (and it's only 909 words, 908 without the title)

Hidden

                Like a sweet lullaby, hushing me to sleep, breathing whistled through the forest’s trees, but I wasn’t about to be lulled; my heart raced at every rustle in the leaves. The bark behind my back cut into my spine as I stood frozen, waiting for it all to be quiet, waiting to hear my own breathing, waiting for myself to sigh in relief when I realized I was alone again. I never did.

            The breathing was closer, I could feel the hot breath blowing past me as I squeeze me eyes shut. Trees snapped as it closed in. I wasn’t sure if it would see me if I ran. I wasn’t sure if it would chase me. I wasn’t sure how I even got into this situation where a shadow was stalking me through the woods.

            I wondered if I should climb the tree I was pressed against. Believe it or not, that wasn’t the weirdest option I considered, but when you weren’t sure what was around the corner, you didn’t deny any thoughts that might help you live. I tried to blindly size up the shadow, but I couldn’t. One thing I did know was that it was clumsy and loud; it snapped through branches and the overgrown weeds, as if it didn’t know I was there, but I knew it saw it me, it turned towards me and followed me to this spot.

            I looked to my right and thought I saw a clearing a little farther out. I suddenly knew where I was and knew that if I could get the clearing, a path was awaiting me a little father out. I wasn’t sure if I could risk the run, but I also wasn’t sure if I could risk standing still.

            I stood frozen. I heard the leaves rustle, a crunch, some sort of grunt, and then I went off sprinting. My legs burned even though I only went a few feet and I kept tripping over invisible obstacles, my legs felt like a bowl of cereal after leaving it sit for too long. Branches whipped me in the face, so I had to blindly run in where I hoped was the right direction. Suddenly I fell flat on my face, my stomach lurched, and I smacked onto the ground, but the ground was clear of weeds and I opened my eyes to see I made it to the clearing.

            Behind myself and heard snaps of twigs. Tears streamed down my scratched face and I tried to scramble into a standing position, but I was too afraid. Feeling defeated I looked up and saw lights. My heart leaped and I started to wildly wave my arms and scream, hoping that the airplane or helicopter might see me. The lights quickly changed direction and started coming down, for a second I wondered how it could descend so fast, but then I decided not to care, because it was coming to save me. Relieved , I ran to the other side of the clearing, hoping that it could get to me before my menacing shadow did.

            I looked to the trees and realized that the light were too late, the shadow was coming from the forest. I hid behind the trees and held my breath praying, watching, crying silent tears, and the shape slowly appeared in the full moon’s light. I saw for legs and a heavy build… horns, I think, then it meandered into the middle of the clearing I saw what it was.

            A crow uttered a cry as I saw in full glory what I was running from. A… cow. A big old cow with brown eyes, looking lost. Its bell must’ve fallen off and it was falling me, trying to get home. I suddenly remembered the lights, I didn’t want them to land on the cow. I pushed away from the tree, ready to wave the helicopter off, but then… I heard the noise I’ll never forget. The whoosh of air, the… flapping. The cow was gone before I could look back at it. I fell back and looked at the spot where it was standing; it was blood stained. I heard a strangled moo and a loud thump, birds flew from trees and I was left sitting dumbfounded, staring into the inky sky. I blindly ran into the trees again and stood until the lights came back, landed on the ground and looked at me. I realized they weren’t lights, they were eyes.

            I turned and ran. I heard the loud whooshing again and continued running. The dense trees I made my way into blocked the moonlight, which is why I ended up smacking into something hard. I guess it was a rock but I was so dizzy I couldn’t tell anything from anything. I heard the flapping again, it was right on top of me. When I turned I could make out two red balls of light, dancing in front of my eyes. I could smell smoke and colors dance around my face. I saw what it was. A lizard monster with scaly bat wings. It opened its mouth, but then, over the hills, I heard my mother's voice calling me home. The dragon turned away from me, so I threw a rock blindly, hitting its snout. It turned towards me, knocked me down, and I closed my eyes, willing my mother to go into the house. Then, the pain came.

                                                 Unicorn Slayer

Random-ness For You To Wrap Your Mind Around

Post #28:

So, i told this to Lewis a little bit ago, but don't you hate it when a gnat flies right into your frickin' face? It's bad enough you're taking over my room, but now you're going to fly into my face? What kind of a jerk are you?!
I hate gnats. Worthless little beings...

Anyways, on a non-homicidal note, have you ever noticed how slower songs have a beat put behind them so you can dance to it whenever they go on the radio? An example: Lights, by Ellie Goulding.
I heard that song before it was on the radio, and there was no fun little beat behind it. It's like it wasn't fun enough for everyone out there to enjoy... Anther example, sorta, is... well i have Tap Tap Revenge 4 for my iPod and it's like finger guitar hero (its really fun, i just hate it when it doesn't notice i hit one ;) ) and a free song to get was If I Die Young, by the Band Perry. We all know that song, depressing in a sad way but kind of makes you reflect on life... anyways, i'm playing it and there's a beat behind that doesn't make you so depressed and you can tap to it. I wonder how (... a gnat just flew in my face, fyi) they put those beats behind the song... who knows, music industry thing i guess.

Today i'm sort of trying to do my summer project, but, alas, distractions are all around... and oh, so fun. The music channel, my iPod, the inter-weber-net. =( Why is my mind so...

Whoa, Whoa, Whoa! A freakin' gnat just flew into my ear, oh god, i hate those things! I even screamed and jumped two feet into the air and then smacked my ear ten times. Noah, you could've left those off the ark. Maybe there'd be more room for some butterflies... just something other than those dumb gnats.

Okay, i'm over my brief stint of self pity and i'm feeling pretty J.O.-ed. (Juiced Off.) I'm mad.

I was going to continue on, but to save you the rage, i'll post later. Maybe a: Random-ness For You To Wrap Your Mind Around 2.0.

Gosh darn those gnats.

This is UnicornSlayer saying, what the frick building?!

                                                Unicorn Slayer

Ponies

Post #27:

I just watched three episodes of My Little Pony, Friendship Is Magic.

According to Rainbow Dash, only Pegasus-es-es... can walk on clouds.

Those Librels!





                                                    Unicorn Slayer

No wait,

                                                     Pegasus Slayer

Trying To Follow A Blog... Something Is Messed Up.

Post #26:

Short, angry post.

So i'm trying to follow this one blog called Mildly Nerdy Ramblings Of A Lovable Freak.
This girl reminds me so much of me and Lewis that it's just... freaking werid and awesome.
But for some reason, it won't let me comment on any of the posts and after ive tried to follow it in the few ways i know how to, it put another little picture blip on her follow list... but it doesn't have my picture (it looks like asdfghjkl;'s picture on my follow list, and my name doesn't even show up when you roll over the picture.
I am so juiced off.
Anyone what to tell what the heck is wrong here?

                                                  Unicorn Slayer

Creative Writing... Probably Some Other Stuff Too

Post#25:

     As i told you a couple posts back, i go to a creative writing class... well i guess it's not a class because we don't learn anything really, but i don't want to call it a creative writing club because that sounds like something you join in second grade and you write stories about a princess who befriends a dragon that breathes gold coin... so i guess i'm going to call it a class.

Anyways, i went there on Monday and I've been going once a month ever since last June... and I'm not sure if this should be a huge confidence boost or a weight on my shoulders for expectations but... my teacher thinks i'm amazing!  (=o

     The last assignment we got was to write a story using a one paragraph prompt she gave us as a springboard. My story was 14 pages long... but other than waiting for my printer to print it for what seemed to be five hours, nothing about the length screwed with anything, so anyways, we were all offered a chance to read our stories and my teacher was all like, "I doubt we can get to (unicorn slayer's) because it's probably sixteen pages long." Then i told her it was fourteen, we laughed, and then she said that because i was such an awesome writer that she was just going to photocopy my story for everyone to take home and read! Then she asked me if that was okay and i said that that was fine and she went on telling everyone how amazing i was! She said something like, "You know how some writers add in three pages describing something that isn't even important to the story and after you read it you wonder why you had to read it? Well that doesn't happen with (unicorn slayer.) She always has consistent information and her stories are always good."

I was sorta like: =O

Then i was like: (=D and i said thanks and i was smiling like an idiot because it was sort of embarrassing and my teacher/adviser said sorry for embarrassing me and then in five minutes she said all that stuff again when she got up to photocopy my story. 

      I was thinking: Oh God, did i do good on this story? Did i say anything stupid? I swore a couple times and used some bad language... but...

     It Freaked Me Out!

     I write two good stories in the beginning and all of the sudden i'm amazing? Maybe i'm being too modest but i guess it's better to be down on yourself then think every word you write is going to make people cry because they're so beautiful. (if only i had the power to do that)

     That sounds like a Superhero! Word Girl! Someone being mugged? I write a sentence full of emotion and throw it at the mugger and they start crying and regret the path they took and give the purse back and go back to high school. I gotta go contact Marvel!

Our newest assignment is... not even an assignment, but we were given a paper about a contest we can join if we want. We have to write a story about dragons in 1000 words or less. This is going to be hard for me because i love to babbled, but apparently my babble is good for the story... Here's the link to the contest site in case you want to try it out (you can win $50!) LINK

     So right now, and through this whole post, i've been listening to this song by Anna Blue called So Alone. I learned about this song becuase there was commercial to buy it as a ringtone. I think this song is beautiful and... amazing. I can kind of relate to Anna Blue because no one knows what her real face is, we just know what her animated counterpart looks like, sorta of like how you don't know who i really am... i kind of want an amimated counterpart now... whose way more beautiful than i am... it wound be like: you know me, but you don't. =P   I've been reading the comments and wow... people are mean! They're calling her emo and meaning it in a hurtful way and saying the song sucked and saying that the internet doesn't need anymore goth crap.

... you could just say you didn't like it.

Then these other people were fighting and telling each other to kill themselves and calling each other f-ing effs who eff their moms.

How could this song influence people to be so violent with their words?

     So in other news. Awhile ago i was looking through the blogs and i went one called: Remarkably Mark. The last post he put up, which was put up two years ago, began with his own theme song! I want my own theme song! Can someone out there please write me a theme song? Lewis, Morgan, random blog reader, maybe Anonymous, Gingavitis could you please write me a theme song? And make me an animated character.
Please?

Last article of business, maybe.

Summer projects.
I hate them. So. Much.
To get into the honor English class next year i have to read all these books and answer fifty stupid questions on them, and half those questions, i was asking them myself! I was like whaaaaaat? Then one of the questions would be like: what happened? and i would be all like, heck man, i don't know.
Hate. Them.
I also hate the fact that i'm forced to read books i don't want to read (i HATE war books!) and then i have to answer philosophical questions like: what was the true meaning of this book? and then i can't just answer, "Always be nice to your friends" because i have to explain myself and have examples from the book but sometimes i just think of meaning by the weight of the whole story itself, i don't have a specific example.
Then i have the exact opposite problem that i do when i creatively write, i have a minimum number of pages to write. I can't write three pages of why The Lord of Flies (which wasn't as good a book i was hoping) was about how people need to watch how they treat each other or one day we might just end up killing each other. I can barely write a paragraph of that.
Now i need to tell you some of those examples are exaggerated, i don't think i have to write three pages of anything, but really what i really have to do seems just as impossible.
So this project is due on August 7th and we have to read three books, The Lord Of The Flies (read it), I Am The Cheese (read it, but didn't really understand it), and A Separate Peace (didn't read it because its a dumb war book, which i HATE, plus we got five pages of info on it to help us understand it... is it really going to be so hard?)
Then for Lord Of Flies we have ten questions per chapter and there are like... twelve chapters, to answer and i'm up to about chapter four or five on those. (At least i started!) and we have to answer a philosophical question. Then for Cheese, there are a bunch of questions and that book was a little... mind game-ish, so i need to google it and get the low down on it. Then for Peace, there are... i think a prompt and then the info papers have a bunch of little activities to do. *sigh*

     I don't want to grow up. I hope that one day something in my brain will click into place and i'll clean my house every day and get up early to meditate before i go work which is where everyone just loves me and the jobs i get, i finish within a couple of days.
     Thinking about the future makes me want to cry. I mean, next year i get my license... the only reason why that excites me is because i can go to the movies whenever i want and see the newest movie, or i can go the library whenever i want and be alone in the peace for hours. That's it. Films and Literature. I found my natural talent. (Sims 2 reference)
     My license. Then what, work? My sister wakes up at 7-8 in the morning to go to work and... it's summer. I hate waking up early, let alone during the summer. I'm going to take my waning innocence this year and love the Saturdays where i sleep to eleven in the morning. But of course, life is going to get in my way of a good time.
     Wow, i'm so depressed right now. I've gotta get this wonderfully sad song out of my head or i'm going to curl up with my kitty after posting this and i'm going to cry into her soft fur.
     I'm such an immature little baby, crying over the fact that life is harder than... harder than... harder than it has been. I should find myself lucky that i have a future, but then again. I'm to busy living in early years where i could spend my summer alone all day in my room, watching TV, thinking about nothing other than when a new episode of my favorite show was coming on. Sleeping until one in the afternoon and staying awake until five in the morning. But really, unless i get a just as a hooker... (which is not happening, although i'm sure i'd look good in fishnets) well, that's just not reality.

     Well i'm going to go now. I'm going to listen to some Linkin Park, listen to them scream out the injustices in the world and listen to them sing about the horrible people in the world and maybe i'll feel a little better, myself. So this is Unicorn Slayer saying goodbye, goodnight, and... stay in school? Don't eat yellow snow? Do your homework? and always make sure you... pet your pets. (They're called pets for a reason.) (oh yeah, and don't forget about that theme song! If mine turtle gets a theme song, i can too! Writers of the world, unite!

                                                    Unicorn Slayer

Movie Marathon Time! (Imagine I Sung That)

Post #24:

Random expression of my movie love: There's a vampire movie marathon on today on the Syfy channel.
Me gusta!
It ends with a Syfy original movie about... guess what... vampires. I know what I'm going to be doing today. My favorite channel with my favorite topic.

(i was online looking up some help for a game i'm stuck on and i decided to drop by and randomly post about something. A bunch of small random posts are way better than a bigger post once a month.)

                                                 Unicorn Slayer

Decided To Show My Love Of Stick Figures

Post #23:


A Stick figure scene i found on Google Images when i looked up: Stick Figure Humor:





It's simple, to the point, silly in a funny way.





My attempt at some stick figure humor:

It's complex and way too overworked and not even that funny... It's all over the place.


Life just sucks.


                                                    Unicorn Slayer

As Random As 4AM Can Get, Now Featuring A Quick Look At One Of My Stories.

Post #22:
So, yeah, you've guessed it. It's 4AM. Well, actually, 4:11AM.
I kind of don't know what to blog about. I decided to blog right now because... well... i was catching up on my Jenna Marbles videos, at 4AM, and i decided that i should create a post, at 4AM, because i had the internet key and i had nothing else to do... at 4AM.
Random Time!
       So i just finished watching Orphan. It's pretty funny that it was on because we (my family) just rented it from family video two days ago. I missed the beginning though but it was probably the family just checking out the orphanage and buying a Russian maniac.


       We also rented Paranormal Activity 2. I've now watched all the Paranormal Activities, and all out of order. I watched 1 first, then 3, and now 2. Honestly, i think 2 is the scariest. Maybe it's just because it's the freshest in my mind, or maybe because we just got a new TV and sound system, so whenever you would hear the woofer (which makes it sound like an earthquake is going on  in the background) you would know to brace yourself for something scary. Also, it seemed like things happened faster than you would think. Like it went from small scares, to big scares, really fast! At first the pool sweeper somehow comes out of the pool and pots are falling from the pot rack, then all of the sudden, the baby is levitating out of its crib! I needed some cool-down time to sort of take a breath, but then dog would bark and be mangled by some force and the girl was dragged down two flights of stairs to the basement to be possessed by the demon that wants her baby?! Everything was just happening so fast, i felt like i jumping from one big scare the whole time other than jumps at separate scares. I rode the high i got from something happening in the middle of the movie, all the way to the end. Does anyone understand what i mean?

       There's this show my sister watches call Awkward. and it's about... i don't know, high school and awkward-ness. Anyways, the main character, Jenna, has a blog, but she hid it from the public because she didn't want anyone to see it... why did you make a blog in the first place, chica? Ever hear of a diary? Then she came to a realization and she decided to un-hide it from the public and someone posts a comment as soon as she does and i guess we're supposed to think someone was reading it the whole time and oh my gosh, blah, blah. Something that made me think, though, was the fact that her narration through the show, was really what she was writing in the blog, so it made me kind of sad because her blog was so soulful, it all came from her heart in a way i don't think i'd ever be able to write in my glorious blog here... makes me wonder... it also make me sad, but i said that already... hmm...

       In my Creative Writing class meeting that was on the 25th, we got our assignment for the month and then we started to brainstorm whatever we were going to write. Now, here's something you should know about the person who teaches the class, she is very chatty, like veeeery chatty, but that's okay because it's kind of comical at times. Someone had a question about writing and she answered it but then everyone just jumped in on the conversation it went a couple of places before swinging away to talking about books in t he library and then coming back to writing and they were talking about blogs. I decided to take advantage of the library's free wifi and i came to my blog and i read some old posts and realized that i didn't even remember posting about some of the stuff i posted about. Then i heard them talking about how people post their stories online for suggestions and to see how people react and i realized that that might be something i would like to do.

       Now, i've thought of doing this before but i was nervous to because what if someone stole my story? I've read and watched too much stuff to be comfortable with the public, but i really do want to see what other people think of my stories, because most of the time, we don't have any time in Creative Writing to share every single person's story, and i hate reading aloud, so, no one had ever read a story of mine that i really wanted to share.

       So, to try something new out, i'm going to post a story of mine  here for everyone to read. I'm going to go with my October horror story because it's the only one that i feel is complete. I feel like it's fine the way it is and i don't need to add another five pages to it to make it better. Well, i guess my story from last June was pretty good, but it was more emotional than adventure-y... and i sorta guess that other one is pretty good to... Okay, i'm starting off with posting my horror story. I've never shared this with anyone yet, so you're the first! (unless someone else read this post before you) it's about... 7 pages i think. Don't ask why the font is huge, but at least you can tell where the post ends and story begins. Enjoy and please, please, leave a comment about what you thought of it! =)     (it's 5:05 now)

                                                  Unicorn Slayer

Blood Sports

T

he people cheered as they looked down into the center of the coliseum. It was dimly lit and shadow-filled from the poor lighting the candles gave off, but the spectators didn’t care, they never did. The candles were everywhere, on every railing, every balcony, on every dark open space, the Blood Sports couldn’t be held during the day and normal electrical lighting didn’t give off the eerie glow the candles did.

          Everyone waited with anticipation for the first door to be opened, and when it was, the cheering was louder than before. Out stepped the intended target, or victim. He looked like a lowly servant, or a man straight off the streets, with an overall dirty look and filthy appearance. Knowing death was waiting for him, he didn’t step out of the doorway, but was shoved by an unseen hand; he fell to his knees, unbalanced and upon getting up, he tried to shrink into the walls and go unnoticed, but the onlookers laughed at his fright.

          Then, the audience was twisted with an eagerness that overtook them all as they looked toward the door on the opposite side of coliseum. Almost all of them were chanting, and almost all were different phrases, but in the end they all meant the same thing: open the door. After an antagonizing minute, the requests were obliged as the sounds of a lifting mechanism echoed and mixed with the roaring of the crowds.

          Nothing was released at first, as if the ones who ran the Sports were still deciding on what to set out, but soon a dark shape appeared and walked elegantly into the arena. With it being my first time to the Blood Sports, I thought it was a joke, someone who was going to announce the monster and run off before it came out, but I was wrong. The members of onlookers who came to the Sports regularly were just waiting for the moment when the creature found its victim and struck: it didn’t take long.

          Still standing in the shadows, it’s eyes and nose quickly found the dirty man who was still pressed up against the cream colored stone walls. He knew hiding was futile, but every fiber in his body told to him to at least try to save himself, but it didn’t work. The dark creature’s eyes lit up with an other-worldly bloodlust and ran, faster than it looked it could ever go, straight to the man. He was dead faster than I expected, but the quick display of aggression was breathtakingly horrible all the same.

          The body fell into the dirt erupting a cloud of dust, and it inadvertently shown the audience the gashes across the neck, making them cheer the loudest they had all night. The vampire looked around at all the blood surrounding it and was planning in its head how to kill every single cheering person, but the walls were too high for anything, even a monster, to climb or jump up. It was too intoxicated to give up its planning, it greedily wanted every drop of blood that surrounded it, but eventually it realized planning and fantasizing would be fruitless and let itself be lured back into the farthest door where it would wait until the next time one of its feedings went public again.

          The spectators started to file out of the coliseum, blowing out the candle in front of them as left. The excitement died down quickly after the predator’s door closed and the body of the man was taken away. It was said that they were taking it be eaten by the werewolf that was sometimes shown on other nights.

          The Blood Sports were started “underground” when a group of men found a scraggly vampire trying bite rats in an ally and thought it would fun to put him in with their enemies in an enclosed room. The vampire tried to get out, not wanting to hurt innocent men, but he couldn’t stop himself because he was so weak. The men that found him thought it was hilarious to watch and invited more people to watch and did it again with a homeless man from the streets, and invited more people and did it again. It grew until the King found out what was happening. No one’s sure what happened next, but soon the Blood Sports started again, and was supported by the current King himself. He thinks that it’s a new way to deal with the homeless population, criminals, lazy servants, and a new way of entertainment for the wealthy.

          Yes, entertainment for the wealthy, you have to pay a big fee to gain admittance to the Sports and don’t think just because I got to watch them that I’m a wealthy person. I’m actually a poor homeless boy, age fourteen, and am fascinated by the Blood Sports. I was always hearing about them while I was out pursuing my career of petty thief, and they sounded mesmerizing, and they were. The fault in them was that it was prohibited for anyone who watched to talk about it outside the coliseum, such as who was killed or what did the killing. I always thought it was a lion, or bear, or other big animal, and never have I once thought a vampire was doing killing, but I’m glad it was, it shown that our world wasn’t as predictable as we all thought.

          The only way I got into the Sports was by sneaking past where you pay under some lady’s big coat; I’m glad I’m unusually short for my age. My friends, pursing the same career as me, were trying to find a back way in, but there aren’t any and they never got to watch. After the coliseum was half-way empty I got out of my hiding spot, if anyone saw me they would know that I snuck in, and made it to where my friends were. They looked frustrated at the fact that they missed it.

  “Did you get in?” one asked in a raspy voice from whispering. I smiled and nodded superiorly. They exchanged amazed glances before crowding closer. “Well, what animal was it? Who died? How much bloodshed?’

  “I don’t know,” I said slyly “I’m not supposed to say, it’s against the rules…”

They didn’t like my answer “Since when have we followed the rules?” he said “Now tell us or I’ll slit your throat,” he withdrew a knife, but said it in a half joking, half serious voice with a wry grin.

  “It was some dirty servant man and there wasn’t much bloodshed because… well you won’t believe what killed him,” I said, just setting them up for a shock.

  “Well,” the one said hungrily “what killed ‘em?”

  “Yeah, what killed ‘em?” a younger one chimed in.

  “It was a-”

  “Hey!” a loud scolding voice shouted cutting me off.

  “-vampire,” I finished before turning to see a bunch of guards congealing together, intent on stopping our conversation before any outside source heard the secret of the Blood Sports.

          In a flash our group broke up and started running, but I must have hesitated because I was pinned to the ground by some unseen force and looked to see an arrow in my shirt at the side, I bet they were aiming for my stomach, the death a ruffian was a small price to pay to keep the secrets of the Blood Sports just that, secret.

          I tried to pull the arrow out of the ground, but it was too deep in to be taken out easily, so I tried to rip away my shirt by just standing up, but I was weak from the fall because it took my breath away. Soon a guard was picking me up from the neck of shirt, ripping the side off, leaving a swatch of fabric stuck underneath the arrow on the ground.

  “What do we have here?” he asked in a gruff voice. He showed me to the other guards, one had a crossbow in his hand, and they all smiled at my misfortune.

          Before I could even blink twice, I was being drug to the coliseum. I kept my eyes open, but made it look like I was severely disoriented so I could watch our route and plot and escape. The guards opened a hidden trap door and my captor lugged me down a staircase while one held a torch and the other with the crossbow made sure I wasn’t going to escape. I could make out a prison of some sort: it was dimly lit with torches on the walls and had cells side by side, some holding one person, some holding many, some empty, all reeking of death and blood; I felt truly privileged to be there. After a long spell of empty cells we stopped at one beside a cell occupied by one person, far away from others. Without warning, the cell was opened and I was thrust inside it. I cracked my head against the hard stone floor and the world around me blurred. My head started to bleed and I passed out.

***

          I woke up in a fog, dizzy and confused. When I sat up against a dirty wall I felt the knot of dried blood tangled in my hair at the back of my head. I looked around the cell, but it was too dark to see anything. I crawled to bars of it, still disoriented, and tried to look out, but saw nothing but a stone wall and a hall extending away to my right. I tried to shout out, but it came out as barely a loud whisper.

  “Don’t even try,” a male voice said. I wasn’t sure of where it came from until I remembered the one in the cell beside me. “The only reason why they’ll come back is to put you in the Sports.”

  “Who are you?” I asked.

          There was a moment of hesitation before it calmly replied,  “Another unlucky soul.”

          I was happy to realize I wasn’t completely alone in this.

  “How long have you been here?” I hoped to gain some kind of time stamp on my stay in this prison.

          There was another hesitation  “Far too long.” I slouched, I was happy to know that I would live, but every moment would be antagonizing, “But you, you will probably not live here for as long as I.”

  “What makes you so special?” I asked, partly apprehensive.

  “Hmm…” the voice said, I could imagine it shrugging its shoulders.

  “When do they usually come back for us prisoners?”

  “You have longer than most here. Usually they wait a couple of days until the point where you’re hungry and weak and even sick to put you in the Sports, so you have a less chance of fighting or resisting of any kind. Personally, I do not understand this, I think it would be much more exciting if the victims ran around blindly before they were attacked,” the voice said smoothly.

  “Okay, well, how many days would you say I have?”

  “A few, three, four. Not many, really.”

          I slouched back. Pretty much everyone has a want to live, even if they have hardly anything to go back to. I doubt that even if I did somehow escape, finding my “friends” would be a hard thing to do. I started a debate with my own self in my head, one side wondering where to look for them, the other questioning the point of such a thing, there was a slim chance I was getting out alive.

  “So they’re just going to let me rot in here until I’m fed to the vampire.”

  “Or werewolf, do not forget about him.”

  “How could I?” I asked rhetorically. “Are you sure there isn’t some way out?”

  “If there was, I would have found it by now,” the voice said glumly.

  “What about the guards? Have you ever tried to, I don’t know, fight them?” I asked hopefully, I just really wanted to get out of that cell.

  “I did try once, when I was first put in here,” my ears perked up “That gash on my head bled for a while.”

  “So you’re saying you lost the fight?” I slouched.

  “Lost? There was barely a fight at all. Thinking back, it was quite foolish for me to even try. There were so many guards, and they themselves could take me down bare-handed, let alone with their knives and crossbows. After getting out of the grip of one guard, another was right behind him to knock me down,” the voice said, shadowed from recollection.

  “How many guards were there?”

  “More than I could count.”

          Well that didn’t make any sense, “Why? There were only three guards on me, why were there so many on you?”

          There was pause, and then a deep breath was taken in and out, “Because I’m a murderer.”

          That was like a punch in the chest. At first, I refused to reply to what he said, not wanting to speak to such a criminal, but then I sighed, not caring anymore, about anything. “Who’d you kill?”

  “Whoever I wanted.”

  “So you just killed random people off the streets?”

  “Yes.”

  “Well… why?”

          There was another pause, this guy seemed to never be able to make up his mind, “Everything vies to survive.”

          What was that supposed to mean? I tried asking him the same question, but he didn’t answer me back, so I sat in the near dark on a dirty floor. I tried to talk to him again, just so I could get some form of socialization, but he never answered back for days. So, alone, I laid and died in the cell, I became hungry and weak after the first two days, by the third I was considering committing suicide, it wasn’t like anyone was going to miss me. There was a lack of tools to do so with though, so, begrudgingly, I took that off my long list of things to do.

          In the distance I would occasionally hear the guards opening cells and laughing at others’ misfortune. If they came close, I would cringe, thinking that they were coming for me, or my silent, murderous, friend, but then they would fade away, my day not coming yet.

          On the beginning of the fourth day is when the voice finally spoke again, “They are coming.”

          I was weak and half asleep, so I barely understood a word “What?” I mumbled.

  “The guards are coming,” it clarified. I tried to listen closer.

  “How do you know-”

  “They are coming for me and you, but there aren’t many, three I think. One to hold each of us, one to make sure we don’t escape.”

  “How-”

  “I think this is the only moment either of us has to escape, be prepared to fight them.”

  “Fight? Are you crazy? I can barely stand!” I harshly whispered. In the distance, I could hear guards.

  “Be prepared to fight,” the voice repeated, almost in a growl.

          In a matter of minutes, the guards came; three, like the voice predicted. They opened my cell first and pulled me out violently, I was dizzy and hurt, tired and hungry. Then they opened the voice’s cell and out stepped the man behind it. He was young, and looked healthy despite the fact that he was in his cell longer than I was. He had copper brown hair and a handsome face, in fact, he didn’t look like a killer at all.

          We started to be lead away, eerily, the guards were silent, except when they would sneer or grunt at me to move faster. Eventually we made it past the cell blocks and into a tiny empty room that divided into two tunnels going opposite directions. The guards started to pull away into the two tunnels, I was going one way, the man was going to the other, he had two of the guards, I had one.

          Suddenly there was a lot of noise and movement behind me, the guard holding me turned around, and I craned my neck to what was happening. Somehow the man got free, and he was winning in a fight with both guards. He hit one of the guards in the nose with the heel of his hand and then kicked out his knee, he feel to the ground, his nose bleeding violently.

          The second came and tried to grab him, but he knocked down and he fell on all fours. The man kicked him in the stomach, and the guard rolled on his back, trying to breath. The guard holding me looked at the man, who smiled and cocked his head, just telling him to bring it on. The guard looked at me, back at the man, and then pushed me away and ran at the man, who was expecting that much. Faster than it seemed he could move, the man had the guard’s hands behind his back, and faster still, he bit into his neck and drank his blood. My mouth fell open in shock. 

  “You’re the vampire…” I said in my whispery voice. He didn’t answer right away, he was busying killing the guard. After a minute, his body dropped and the vampire looked at me.

  “Yes, I am,” he said simply. He started to walk towards me, but I backed up “Come, if I wanted to kill you, you would be dead by now, and I am sure that you need my help if you want to live.”

  “Why are you helping me?” I asked, still uneasy.

  “Pity maybe, could be friendship, I am still not completely sure, but if we are to get out of here alive, we need to leave, now,” he said strongly and went through a door that I didn’t notice before because it looked the same as the wall. We were in a dark tunnel, lit with the occasional torch, that lead to an unknown place.

  “Did you kill that guard you… bit?”

  “No, I just did that for some strength, plus he was about to get on my nerves, I could just tell. He is going to wake up with a bad neck-ache, but that is as far as his pain will go.”

  “So he’s not going to be a vampire?”

  “No, just angry."

          Content with my answers, I continued to run as best as I could, behind me I started to hear the voices of men, I could only think that they were the guards. Slowly, a door appeared ahead of us which we ran through. We found ourselves in the arena. I never wanted to know what it was like to in there, but I realized that it was like being in a big bowl, really. We were on the side of the oval shaped arena, the victim door was to the left, the vampire/werewolf door was on the right; we came out of the door they used for “clean-up.”

  “Well, mister smart guy, where to now?” I asked sarcastically.

  “Through there,” he said, pointing to an identical looking door across from on the other side of the oval. It wasn’t a far walk, the oval was longer than it was wide, but it seemed so far away. We started to run towards it “This door leads outside the arena, if we make it, we will be free.”

          Being free sounded pretty good to me, so I tried ran faster, but before we made it halfway to it, a big and bright flood light turned on. The vampire put out a hand to stop me.

  “What’s happening?” I asked quietly.

          Before I could be answered we heard a long clanging mechanical noise and, turning, we saw the vampire/werewolf door opening. A guttural growl sounded from behind it.

  “No,” the vampire whispered. Out sprang the werewolf, huge and angry.

          It looked like a wolf, but it was higher and thicker. Its fur was dark and mangy, and its eyes were red and burning. It locked its eyes onto me first. I wanted to scream out, but my throat was too dry, and I was numb from terror. I tried to run, but I was too weak and when the wolf pounced on me and knocked my breath out, all I could do was lay there.

          I was under its big paw being crushed while it tried to bring its snarling face down to my neck to kill me quickly. Instinctively, I out my hands to push it away, but it was too strong and I couldn’t find a hold. Rank breath rained down on me and I turned my head and looked away.

          Suddenly, the pressure on my chest lightened and I looked to see the wolf getting off me, but it was so it swipe me with its paw. Four parallel lines stretched down my chest and on part of my cheek, my shirt was ripped to shreds. Searing pain burned my body. It was about to come down on me again, but the vampire knocked him out of the way. He looked at me and whispered a single word that I tried to follow, “Run.”

          The scratches hurt like Hell, but I ran and tried to open the door to the outside, it wouldn’t budge, so instead I ran into a corner and tried to appear invisible.

          The vampire and werewolf were engaged in an epic battle. Sometimes it looked like the vampire was wining, sometimes it looked like the werewolf was winning. In the end, the vampire won the battle. The wolf let out a whine as it died. Sadly, I was half dead and missed the fight.

          Through blurry eyes I saw guards come in and take away the vampire and werewolf body and they lugged me away too. I passed out.

          When I awoke, I was in a cell again, it seemed like the same cell I was in before, which meant the vampire was most likely in the one beside me. The scratches felt numbed, but my head was heavy in pain. I looked up to see a rather smug looking guard watching me.

  “Werewolf and vampire fights,” he said in thought, “that seems like a new thing to introduce to the Blood Sports.” He walked away, a haughty chuckle following.

          I wondered what he was talking about until I noticed that the glare of the torch in front of my cell glowed gray instead yellow. The marks on my stomach were shining scars, thick dark hair was on the back of my hands, and my teeth felt sharp and canine.

  “And unlikely friends become natural adversaries,” the vampires voice said solemnly.

          I then realized how hungry I really was…